Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Detective Work and a Fist Fight

I'm trying to figure out why the alarm went off in a gated self-storage business in the middle of the night. I see a young woman but can't run because of my hip, so my boss appears and starts chasing her. The young woman was too fast and escapes climbing up a fence.

My boss and I walk around to see where the young woman was hiding,  during this an electrician joins us. I lie down on the ground to open up a storage unit, I for some reason stay on the ground and examine the storage unit. It is filled to the top with boxes and luggage. I notice someone eyes peering through the some luggage. We open it to find another young woman who is living there, it was her visiting friend who set off the alarm when she left. We find out that she's a runaway and been there for years. Now the electrician's mother-in-law is there, she takes the young woman with her.

Now I am alone, I continue to walk around and see a car coming to leave through the gate. Somehow I know it's a drunk driver,  so I stand in front of the gate to stop him driving the streets. He gets out of his car yelling at me and we begin to fight. We fist fight until he sobered up, then I let him go.

Sweet dreams.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Scouting for Investment Partners

I'm traveling up and down Vancouver Island on a Greyhound bus. As people come on and off I try to get them to invest in gum ball vending machines. After a long time of rejection a short, large, 80 year old man with a pencil thin mustache shows some interest. I tell him that if he joins me that in solidarity I too will grow a mustache. He turns around in his seat covering his face then turn around without his mustache. He says nothing, but I know it was his way to show me how much he wants to invest. Excited about our business partnership I look at the window to watch fields and fields of peacocks and miniature horses.

Sweet dreams.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Mitt Romney + Chaz Bono = Frenemies?

I'm in a bar at a Republican "town meeting" for two time candidate Mitt Romney. There are loads of cameras and press there. I'm standing near the front and Mitt comes out with his ever present smile and starts talking only to be interpreted by Chaz Bono (Cher and Sonny Bono's daughter who recenlty got a sex change).

Chaz is sitting down wearing a western cowboy outfit and starts asking questions about Mitt's views on gay, transgendered people. Mitt tries to answer, but Chaz just talks over him and begins going off about being a "born this way". That's when Mitt can't take anymore.

While keeping his smiles he yells at her "That's the point, you WEREN'T born that way!" A bunch of loggers stand up and applaud politely. Mitt becomes so furious that his skin turn silver.

A news reporter interrupts and says "The nomination from the Republican party came in. Mitt Romney won!"

Chaz and Mitt are all of sudden friends.


Sweet dreams.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Shopping for Faith's Birthday Gift at Superstore


I'm in Superstore (for the uninitiated, it's a grocery/clothing/seasonal items/kitchen appliances/et cetra store that's super) shopping for a watch for Faith's birthday. As I go down an aisle it quickly becomes a very swanky, exclusive, high end store with dim lighting and techno music. I realize that I came here by accident and that it was very important to not let the staff find out I don't belong in there.

A sales rep asks what I'm looking for and I tell her. She shows me a watch and necklace set, saying "You MUST get it for her, she can't be seen without it!" I look at the price and I knew I couldn't afford it and but I knew Faith MUST have this watch and necklace made from a bicycle chain.

So I go to the counter to pay with my bank card. Every time I go to type in my code I get a text message on the machine from my grandma Hazel and it cancels out the transaction. Unable to buy the bicycle chain watch and necklace I leave the swanky store ashamed,  but relieved I had an excuse to not buy it.

Sweet dreams.